Wednesday, April 28, 2010

I quit...

Well, peeps, I tried.

But I think that I am letting go of my dream.

That is, my dream to blog every day until I get a job.

I just don't have that much to day these days, and rather than waste my time trying to come up with a post that's just short and lame and waste your time with something not worth reading, I'll only blog when I actually have something interesting to blog about.


Sorry if this comes as a disappointment. I know, I know-- reading my blog was the highlight of your day, but think how much better it will be when it becomes rare!

That's right, I'm building the tension!


Tuesday, April 27, 2010

The vanity continues:

Once again, this post is dedicated to my sister, Sarah Lewis:

I was going through this box of old cards and notes and such, because I am a major pack-rat and I felt like purging.

So it was while rummaging through this random box of hilarious memories that I stumbled upon this note.

I am an avid note writer. I wrote lots of notes in high school to friends in different classes, I wrote notes to folks in college, and I continue to write little notes to Stephen every once in a while.

This is one of the few notes I've received from Sarah. And here is why I kept it-- on the back of this note, she wrote me a poem. It cracked me up then, it cracked me up 5 minutes ago when I read it again, and I am hoping it will make you all laugh as well.

I also hope she does not mind me sharing this.... But it's so much more amusing than anything I could come up with today:


20 minutes to go
Can I make it? Probably so.
I miss your face, but by God's grace
I'll see you soon.
Last night I had a dream
(not like Martin Luther King's)
In my dream I had a baby
She was tiny and lived in water
I know, I know it's crazy, but I
surely loved my little daughter.
Adina kept screaming about a man in her bed,
I just wanted to hit her in the head.
That was my dream-- crazy as it may seem.
I'll go... pay attention now
And I'm tried of rhyming, so I don't care.
Poem over.

(In case some folks don't know, Adina was Sarah's college roommate)

I hope you enjoy this poem. I do!!

And Sarah, if I had seen this note on Sunday, it would have made it into the top 25 list. :)

Sunday, April 25, 2010


Today, in honor the 25th birthday of my awesome sister, Sarah, our Sunday edition of Weekend Listing is a tribute to her greatness!

Also, this is Sarah's Golden Birthday, which is even specialer, so:

I will now list the 25 greatest memories I have of Sarah~

1. We have a home video of Sarah telling jokes from when she was 3 or 4, I think. The whole thing is amusing, but the best part is when Sarah tells this joke: "And the horse kissed the cat!" And then she laughs and says, "Huh, huh huh? Did you geeeet it?"

2. At one point during our childhood, Sarah had an iguana named Zeke. There are pictures somewhere that show this iguana in Sarah's hair. I wish I knew where that picture is today.

3. Sarah usually got along great with animals, but one time our cat Roo was trying to sit on her stomach while she was trying to homework. So Sarah pushed Roo off of her bed. Roo jumped back up and sprayed her in the face, so Sarah drop-kicked him down the hall.

4. There is an awesome aquarium in Vancouver, Canada and our family used to go up there during the summers when we were young. Our favorite exhibit was the beluga whale exhibit. One time, we were watching the beluga show and Sarah picked out her favorite beluga, Nanoo Nanoo. After the show, we went down to the railing to look at the whales. This part is a little fuzzy; I'm not sure if she said the whale's name or if it swam up to us on it's own, but it spit a stream of water right at Sarah. Freaked her out!

5. That same day, a black squirrel stole her hot dog while it was in her hands. And then, after she ran off screaming, it went back for her bag of Cheetos.

6. Our dad bought a boat when we were in late elementary school or junior high, and Sarah was fearless. I have lots of memories of her learning to water ski or just riding in the inner-tube for fun.

7. A few summers, Sarah and I went to a church camp on Mt. Baker. They did a 5 am Polar Bear Plunge and I am pretty sure that Sarah participated.( It's one of the reasons I think you are brave, so if this isn't true, Sarah, I wouldn't refute it)

8. In junior high, Sarah was on the drill team for a year, which was like a dance team. She learned a routine to Britney Spears's song Crazy. I can still picture her practicing the moves in the basement. Of course, that may be because every once in a while she tries to see if she can still remember them. I bet after she reads this, she'll try to do the steps... (You'll admit it if I'm right, right Sarah?)

9. In high school, Sarah was given a jeep-type car, a Dihatsu Rocky. It earned many nicknames in the time she had it, but the best one was the Jesus Jeep.

10. Sarah broke her ankle while diving off a lifeguard stand in junior high. In high school, she had to have surgery to fix something with the growth plate in her ankle. Her anesthesiologist was a man, who was unacquainted with women, and he could not remove her bra. She told me this story while still groggy from the anesthesia, so that may be why I think it is so funny.

11. Our church did a children's musical (eons ago) called Good King's Come in Small Packages, and Sarah had the lead. I believe her name was Elizabeth. She was good.

12. Somewhere, Sarah found this awful sparkly spandexy crazy colored costume thing. She would put it on and perform Michael Bolton's classic hit, Love Is A Wonderful Thing with a hairbrush for a microphone. I wish I had a photo of her in this outfit, but the only one I could find was of my ex-boyfriend in the costume... And no one wants to see that.

13. A few Christmases ago, I took Sarah to get her ears pierced. I think I was more scared for her than she was for herself. I'd had mine pierced 2 years before, I think, and the people who took me kept telling me that it wouldn't hurt and it hurt bad. So I told her that I was going to be honest with her and tell her it hurt. A lot. But she was cool as a cucumber.

14. Stephen likes to tease me and Sarah, because our conversations are about 23% real life and 77% TV shows. It's a funny way to communicate, but we like it, cause we both like to laugh. And we typically find the same things in a show funny.

15. Sarah does an amazing karaoke rendition of Queen's Fat-Bottom Girls. It's pretty legendary. I mean, if you haven't seen it, you need to add it to your bucket list.

16. Our old church, Celebration Community, used to go on church retreat weekends. The best place was called Black Lake. Again, I have lots of memories from there, but the best one is the year that Sarah wrote a "Veggietales" skit for us young kids to perform and we wore red and green sleeping bags for Bob and Larry.

17. Sometime during high school, Sarah had to have surgery for a deviated septum. If you know me well, you know that I do not do well with blood. But Sarah's bandages had to be changed regularly and I had to help. This probably sounds like a gross memory, but for some reason I remember it with some gladness. I think it was the first time I felt like Sarah needed me to help her. She's super independent and I know that is part of the reason I am super independent.

18. When I was a freshman at SBU, Sarah took me to my first SBU football game. I was so badly sunburned that I could only wear 1 type of shirt-- i.e. the shirt type I had on when I got burned. But Sarah was so nice. She went to the store and got me lotion and she made fun of me less than anyone else.

19. Sarah likes to send me about a thousand text messages on my birthday. She's done this every year since we were given cell phones. And we got cell phones for Christmas my freshman year of college. I've actually saved some cause they are so funny.

20. In Sarah's sophomore year of college, she brought a few friends to Seattle for Spring Break. I have so many funny memories of her from that trip, but my favorite was when we went to Ft. Casey and had a random song-time in one of the bunkers.

21. One time when Sarah came home from college on break, she taught a few of us at church an 'interpretive dance' to Avalon's Testify to Love. We performed it at a church, not our church. I wish someone had video-taped that!

22. My senior year of high school, I was in a musical. Sarah was still at SBU when it started, and I really wanted her to make it home for at least 1 of the shows. It was either the night before closing night, or closing night that Sarah made it home and was able to go to my show. I was glad that other people were there, but having her there was most important to me.

23. During the HORRIBLE ice storm in Bolivar, January of 2007, the power went off in my dorm. Sarah came to pick me up in her Cadillac and let me stay at her apt with her 2 roommates. We played lots of card games.

24. One year, when we were in Bolivar, for Sarah's birthday, we had dinner at Red Robin and then we went mini-golfing. I'm pretty sure that at one point Sarah got so bored she laid down on the course. Or maybe she was just tired. But I have this mental image of her lying on the green AstroTurf.

25. When Stephen and I went to Seattle the week before our wedding, Sarah did all that she could to spend time with us. We had early Christmas, went light looking, had Kau-Kau downtown. And she took us karaoking. I know Stephen did not love it like I did, but karaoke with Sarah is one of the best things ever.

There are about 23 years of memories that could have made it into this list and I wish I could name more. Because my sister is super fantastic. I am pretty lucky to have her. We did not always get along (I mean, we are sisters). But, I am not only proud to call her sister, I am proud to call her a friend.

I hope this list makes you laugh and does not make you want to punch me, Sarah! This is just a sample of the fun times I have shared with you and I look forward to many years more!!


Saturday, April 24, 2010

I have the attention span of a... OH! Glitter!

My attention span has greatly shortened since my graduation from SBU.

I could blame this on my husband, but I think the blame lies with Texas.

And I thought I had a short attention span in college.

It's true. I did my fair share of procrastinating. I focused in classes pretty well, I think. Unless it was choir with Dr. Campbell. Oops.

But my attention is diverted so quickly now! And I think it's because I have been bored so often. While Stephen is at work, I search for jobs and play on FB. That's about it.

Sure, I clean up the apt, but it doesn't get too messy when I'm cleaning it 2 or 3 times a day...

We don't do a big breakfast or lunch, so I don't have much to do for or after those meals.

I've read all the books in my personal library since we moved here. But it took me DAYS to finish some books. Which is just silly, cause I used to be able to sit and read for hours! Just this week, I started reading The Great Gatsby, which is one of my favorites. I've had to stop after every chapter and do something else. I just can't get hooked. Maybe it's cause I've read it so many times?

Stephen's attention span has decreased too, but I don't think he is as bad as me yet. We sometimes watch a movie with or after dinner, but in the last 2 weeks we haven't made it straight through any of them. We pause them and do other things. Tonight we watched X-Men III: The Last Stand, and I think we paused it about 8 times. To make dinner, to get seconds, to refill our water, to clean up after dinner, to go to the bathroom, to frost a cake I made earlier today (strawberry with chocolate frosting! YUM.), to play on FB. And it's been this way for weeks.

When did I put up the post about our super secret project? Um, like a month ago?? Yeah, it's still not done. I think we work on it maybe every other day... Maybe. We sit down to work on it and end up having staring contests or with Stephen asking for a back rub or me asking him to scratch my back...

I try to listen to music... but I always feel like I need to do something with my hands or sing really really loudly. I usually opt for sing really really loudly, until I fear people 6 blocks away can hear me. But I tend to view this like a child: if I can't see them, they can't hear me.

The last 2 or 3 days, I haven't even had the focus to write a full blog post for all of you! I'd be so distracted that it would be 11:30 before I'd remember I hadn't blogged and then I'd type some silly little nothing just so I could say I blogged... I apologize, loyal fans. I apologize.

And I know what you are thinking, "Today is Saturday! Where is my super favorite Weekend Listing??" Well, I am so attention-diverted that I didn't realize I should be typing a Weekend Listing till I hit enter after that last paragraph... Boo.

Ok, Weekend Listing, Weekend Listing... What can I list??

Got it! Here are the top five places I wish I could go out to eat:
5. Panera
4. Chipotle
3. Red Robin
2. Coldstone Creamery
And the number one place: Outback Steakhouse!

I know, that was like the lamest WL ever, but you all love me! So it's ok.

And now I must leave.


P.S. A special shout-out to my super awesome sister, Sarah, who has been GBWE-ing (Golden Birthday Weekend Extravaganza) it up this weekend (and will continue tomorrow) in honor of her 25th birthday! Sister, tomorrow I will have a very special Weekend Listing-Sunday style- in honor of you! Check it out!

Friday, April 23, 2010

They call me Eeyore:

"I cannot blog tonight," says I,
For if I do, I fear I'll cry.

And then my blog would no longer be funny;
for crying makes my nose more runny.

I've no jokes to tell, or stories, or songs.
My brain is mushed up, like stir-fry in tongs.

I know that I vowed to blog daily until
"Regular work!" I could happily peal.

But, my dear friends, I spoke a bit too soon,
for my life is more dull than I once assumed.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Because I am too tired to actually try:

If only we were llama

No matter if we knew how to place a comma

Although we couldn't wear pajama

And have no fingers for Bowl-a-Rama

I'd be happy with having less drama

Can you imagine a llama Obama?

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

I've only got 4 minutes!

To be able to say I wrote a post today, I would have to finish and publish it in the next 4 minutes.

I don't know if I'll make it.

And even if I do, it will only be nonsense.

Not that my posts are super meaningful now, but at least they are usually cohesive.

If I were really creative, I'd write a quick Dr. Seuss-type poem that would make you all laugh so hard you cry.

But I've only got 2 minutes left...

Actually, make that one.

Ok, so I'm out of things.

I'm publishing this!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Does it surprise you I got hooked?


It's true, I watch Glee. And I like it.

I like the music, the twists on songs, and the vocals are pretty good.

Would I be disappointed if there was less drama? NO! But I'll watch it even if there is drama.

I liked this week's episode. It was Madonna-inspired. I'm not a huge Madonna fan, but I know some of the songs and like some of the songs.

But it was the Glee-twist that I really liked.
And I liked that there was more singing-less drama this week. Of course there are the classic love/drama elements, which are mostly annoying at this point, and the rivalry thing, which is also old. But the show is best when it focuses on music and not drama, and I think they are getting into that rhythm better with this season.

Also, I love the guest starts!

Season one brought Kristin Chenoweth, one of my all-time favorite performers. She was the original Galinda/Glinda in Wicked, one of my favorite musicals. I liked her on Glee! And I saw that she is going to be on again next week and I am super excited.

Last week, Idina Menzel was on, and she is also incredible. I wish they'd had her sing! She was the original Elphaba/Wicked Witch in Wicked, along-side Kristin Chenoweth. I think it would be super amazing if they were on the show together!

But, I am most excited for NPH! That's right, Neil Patrick Harris is supposed to appear on Glee this season and I CAN'T WAIT! I adore NPH. I think he is so talented and soooo hilarious. I think it is apparent that I am stoked for his appearance.

I have downloaded a ton of Glee song-versions from iTunes and I must say, I listen to them a lot. I think if I had known about Glee before it started, I would have wanted to audition. Glee is so my kind of thing. I loved singing in high school and I wish we'd had a show choir. I did musical theatre, which was AMAZING, but I think show choir is more my taste.

I love musicals and I am constantly wishing that my life was more like a musical. I don't sing as much (or as well) as I used to, and I miss it.

So I'll live vicariously through Glee. At least, as far as the singing goes.

And when I'm alone, I'll belt my favorite musical tunes and pretend I'm in a crowded hallway somewhere where no one notices me singing a poignant ballad.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Let's hear it for the coffee...

I love my husband a lot.

I love him even more than I love coffee.

And there are few things in this world that I love more than coffee.


If you've been around me in the morning, you know that I am happiest if I get about a cup and a half of the good stuff.

If you've hung out with me in the late afternoon or early evening, you know that there are few desserts that compare with a fancy cup of joe (Unless there's cheesecake or ice cream, I'm having coffee).

Coming from the land o' Starbucks, Seattle, where there literally IS a Starbucks on every corner, has made me appreciate this delicious beverage.

Cold, with ice, frappucchino style, hot, with ice cream floating in it, with whip, different flavors, with syrup, with drizzle: the possibilities are limitless.

The only way I don't like coffee is plain. Or with too much caramel. I'm not a fan.

Some have hypothesized that perhaps I like the fancy flavorings and not the actual coffee.
But I must refute this theory.

That is like saying that I like the icing more than I like the cake.
Or that I like the music but not the lyrics.
It would be like loving the Bel and Biv but not De Voe.

It just doesn't work.

All those fancy toppings and flavors are nothing without good coffee at the center!

When Stephen and I were in Bolivar and in Cleveland, we bought whole coffee beans and ground them ourselves (well, with a grinder). If we had yucky beans, no matter how much creamer or sugar we put into it, it was still bad coffee. If we had good beans, we could put just a touch of creamer and sugar and the coffee would be fabulous.

Now that we are in Waco, we've found a brand of already ground coffee that we like. And we still get different creamer flavors, but it's the coffee that makes it yummy.

Plus, the caffeine side affects are fun. Stephen gets "coffee hyper" and likes to be creative and crazy (and sometimes he gets obnoxious). I think I am pretty much the same.... Well, maybe I get a little hyper...

We'll call this my ode; my ode to coffee.

'How do I love thee, Coffee?
Let me count the ways;
I love thee for making my breakfast yummier,
For being the reason I can stay awake on rare days I go to work,
Because without you, I'd laugh a lot less at Stephen,
For being warm and cozy in the winter,
For being cold and refreshing in the summer.
Oh, Coffee, I love thee for all these reasons.
And so many more!

Coffee is awesomeness times a bazillion, and if you don't already love it, you should.

I have spoken.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Weekend listing??

I know you are all curious.

"Will Heather post a Weekend listing today??"

Be curious no longer; it's time for Weekend Listing -- Sunday style!

Tonight's list is inspired by some of my very bestest friends:

Anna Robertson, Janna Laugherty, Kristin Edwards, Emily Iler, and of course, my husband Stephen.

I miss my friends. They are amazing! I think that is part of the reason I am so reluctant to make friends here in Waco. I like the ones I already have; I don't want new ones!

So I am going to list one of my favorite memories with each of these hilarious and wonderful and awesome people:

1. Kristin: There was the one time when we went to the City Museum in St. Louis. For some reason, you and I wandered away from the group and went into the creepy carnivally part. We sat in an old bumper car and proceeded to try and make it move for like half an hour. A couple of guys sitting at a nearby table got hit more than once and looked at us like we were nuts. We didn't care. It was just so funny. And now we have the picture of us in the bumper car to remember that time forever!!

2. Janna: There was the time I stayed at your house for Thanksgiving. We made like 6 happy mix CD's for the drive to Peoria and we went to see Enchanted 3 times in the theatre! We also made puppy chow and watched Hairspray with your sisters. Madison asking about the flasher will always make me laugh! We watched a ton of other movies and both bought copies of Joe vs. the Volcano. That was a very happy week of Janna-time.

3. Anna: There was that time when we were roommates and, while a lot of hilarious stuff happened when we lived together, my favorite night was the night we held hands and told each other funny elementary school stories and then sang like 2 NSYNC songs. We stayed up talking super late and we kept laughing and Kristin and Janna finally had to tell us to shush cause we were being super loud. That, my friend, was legendary!

4. Emily: There was the time when you and I drove to meet in the middle-of-nowhere Kentucky last summer so that we could hang out for a few hours. The town had all those pigs and we walked around those antique stores and you bought me that hideous/gorgeous ring! (I still wish the flower hadn't fallen off..) We ate at Sonic and talked about nothing and everything and life and our other friends and how much we missed those SBU times when we were all together. It was happy and so amazing to see you. The only stinky part was that we only got to hang out for a few hours before we both had to head back home. But still, it was great times!

5: Stephen: There was that one time when we got married. I think that about says it all! (I love you)

While I have other friends (like Rachel Greene and Sarah Lewis and others) that make my heart happy too, these 5 people have been there for me for a long time and they are more than friends now. They've become a part of my family.

Miss you guys and love you bunches and bunches!

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Reader Discretion is Advised

I would say 'Happy Saturday', but this is one of the blackest Saturdays I've ever faced.

The story I am about to share is not for the faint of heart. It will disturb you.

This I promise.

I know you were all looking forward to a weekend listing.
I was.

But, sometimes things happen that change your whole life.

This is one of those stories.

Stephen and I were headed to Wal-Mart this afternoon to buy groceries.

We made our list and we were all set to go. I just needed to grab something to go over the shirt I had on.

So I went to my closet and put on my brown hoodie-type thing.

***********(This is where it gets awkward/awful)*****************

I was about to zip it up when I felt something in my shirt.

Assuming it was just hair, I reached to remove it.

It was a spider.


It had been roosting on my brown hoodie-type thing and crawled onto me.

I flipped.

I stripped.

I screamed.

And started shaking and crying.

(I shudder just thinking back. Big convulsive shudders)

So Stephen came in to see what the commotion was and I less than calmly screamed "Spider in my shirt!!!"

So he searched the floor, found the spider and killed it.

I couldn't stop shaking.

I was convinced it bit me.

I am still convinced it bit me.

So, if in a few days I die, or become Spider-woman, be on alert.

This could happen to you. I wasn't prepared. But I am now.

Stephen will not only bug-check my slippers, but he will be spider checking my entire closet before I will go near it.

I may never wear that brown hoodie-thing again.

Let my story caution you. I hope none of you have to face the horrors that I did. I hope none of you have to go to sleep at night and dream about the spider that attacked you.

(This is a Public Service Announcement and a true story)

Friday, April 16, 2010

Oh the places you go...

I'd like to share a story with you. It's no secret I'm not a big fan of pets. Just ask my husband.
There are many stories I could tell about ill-fated animals that crossed my path, but I was reminded of a particular one this week.

So anyway, I was working at an apartment compound's office this week, and on the desk where I sat there was a beta fish.

This beta fish was so unhappy.

It didn't swim much or eat much. It's scales were droopy and changing colors.
It looked close to meeting the Great Porcelain Gate to the Watery Beyond.
(or something poetic like that...)

Luckily, it didn't die while I was there. But it did remind me of the escapade that occurred several years ago involving myself, my then-roommate Erin B, and two fish named Zolton and Komini.

Erin and I had moved out of Leslie hall and into an apartment several minutes from campus in Bolivar. We were really excited about having our own place. Sarah lived with us for some months in our new abode, and moved out in January. Our place seemed a little lonely after she left, so we decided there was room for a pet in our lives.

So to Wal-Mart we went! Fish, we decided, was a safe pet for us. We bought a bowl and rocks and a plant-thing and food and a net and these flower pods that grow in the water. Once we'd picked out all the accessories, we looked at the fish.

We decided we wanted to go a step above goldfish. So we purchased these fancy fish. One was gold and one was silver. We named them Zolton and Komini (cause we love Gilmore Girls). So we took them home and set them up and waited for them to be exciting.

(*Spoiler alert: FISH ARE NOT EXCITING)

Well, they didn't seem to like their new home. Within 24 hours, Zolton died. Then about 8 hours later Komini bit the dust too. (I even wrote a little poem about our dead fishes)

BUT: did you know that Wal-Mart will refund your dead fish within like 60 days??
So we took our dead fish back and got new ones.

We decided to go with the goldfish this time, cause they are a hardier fish and they are cheaper.

These little guys were named Copper and Boom (again a GG reference).

And they did pretty well. We kept their bowl clean and fed them.

Pretty soon, though, Erin and I became bored.

Cleaning a fish bowl is gross and tedious. And, again I'll say, fish are boring.

So we decided to liberate them into the pond at the Bolivar park...

We put them into cups and drove out to the park. We said our good-byes and released them one at a time.

Of course, something big and murky probably nabbed them as soon as they hit the water, but we prefer to believe they are still alive and well in the pond. Maybe they are even giant goldfish now!

This is just one of my many attempts at being a good pet owner. They have all failed.

I'm not a pet person.

But at least I didn't try to liberate a puppy into the pond at the park...

Thursday, April 15, 2010



I am so sorry I didn't blog for your enjoyment yesterday.

You see, I've been feeling under the weather.

I've never understood that phrase. Aren't we always under whatever weather is happening?

So, I've been feeling quite sickly. In fact, I was unable to report to work today, because I spent most of the late night/early morning resting on the bathroom floor.

Also, I fell asleep around 900 last night. My sweet Husby woke me up around 930, I guess and helped me move from the couch to our bed.

It's been an unpleasant few days for me. But I think I am starting to get better.

However, I'm still not 100%, so you'll have to accept my excuses, as this is all the blog you'll get today.

Know that someday the funny will return to my bones and I'll have you chuckling to yourself in no time!

Until then, Anna, I feel like there is a bug crawling on my back/neck and it is all your fault.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010


Instead of writing a witty blog post for you all to enjoy, I am going to work on a super secret project with Husby.

We've been trying to come up with a super secret project and this one is a winner.

Someday it will sit on our coffee table and everyone will see it.

It won't be super secret then.

Until then, amuse yourselves by trying to guess what the super secret project is-- but I warn you, I'll give nothing away.


Monday, April 12, 2010

Let's take a vote!!

So, Stephen and I did the unthinkable tonight:

We went to Wal-Mart at 8pm!!!

I know!

Just yesterday I was saying that I was too old for that stuff and tonight I went and defied it!
That is progress, I think.

So anyway, after Wal-Mart, Stephen bought us a venti Java Chip Frappuchino from Starbucks.
YUM! Haven't had one in months, so it was way deliciouser than my imagination had dreamed.

While going through the parking lot, we noticed a bunch of guys in suits and ties walking around.
One had a guitar.
A few had flowers.

I was fascinated. And still am. I am dying to know what they were doing.
But, I can't.
Cause we are home now. We didn't wait to see what they were up to.

So, I've come up with the next best thing:
Let's vote on what we think they were doing!

Ok, you'll have three options. Vote, and we'll see which one wins!

Here are your choices:
1. A band of ninjas (dressed less conspicuously than in the black pajamas) about to bring the justice on the people frequenting the Starbucks.

2. A bunch of high school seniors helping their friend "Todd" ask one of the Starbucks baristas to the prom.

3. A batch of Mormons (or Jehovah's Witnesses) going to try and convert all the rebellious coffee lovers.

What do you think they were doing??

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Sunday-- Weekend Listing-style

It's 9:30pm.

For some reason, any time after 8pm feels late these days.

That is probably really sad and incomprehensible to most people my age.

And I agree.

I'm only 23. I am plenty young to stay up late and go out and do things.

But I don't feel that way. I feel old these days. There are a lot of things I did when I was in college that I feel too old to do now.

So (HIMYM-style), here are the top 10 things on my Murtaugh list:
(for those of you not in the know, Murtaugh is a character from the movie Lethal Weapon who always says "I'm too old for this stuff." I've never seen the movie, but this idea is used in an episode of How I Met Your Mother.)

10. Stay up past 12pm
9. Wake up later than 10am
8. Listen to music really loud like I did in Bolivar
7. Eat pizza for more than 2 meals in a row
6. Dance in public
5. Wander the mall for hours and hours
4. Have movie (or TV show) marathons
3. Drink coffee past 6 or 7pm
2. Make friends
And the number 1 thing I'm too old to do:
Go to Wal-Mart later than 7pm!

And there we have it!

In all reality, I'm probably not too old yet to do most of these things.

But, I stick by my list. Any challengers?

Saturday, April 10, 2010

It's WEEKEND LISTING! With Heather Cowden!

Happy Saturday!

Folks, inspirations come from all sorts of places.

Today my inspiration comes from Anna Robertson, the 2 large cups of coffee I drank at breakfast (made by my super husband and it was delicious!) and the fact that I am 23 and there is still so much I want to do in life.

So, for your viewing pleasure, I present Heather's* Bucket List!
(suggestions are welcome):

Part A:
See Van Gogh's Starry Night at the Museum of Modern Art in NYC
Sing Karaoke with Anna Robertson
Ride on a cargo ship with Kristin Edwards
Write a TV show about Flashback shoes
Go salsa dancing
Audtition for a Broadway musical
See the polar bears in Manitoba, Canada
Take a nap outside in the sunshine
Collect postcards from every state in the US; Hawaii and Alaska included
Be part of a "book club" (more like a Finer Things Club, if you know the Office)
Take a class at a community college just for fun

Part B:
Fly first class
Live overseas for at least a year
Visit 7 major bodies of water (together)
[*Gulf of Mexico
*English Channel
*Black Sea
*Baltic Sea
*Irish Sea]
Eat Italian food in Italy
Attend a church service in at least 7 countries
Go ice skating
Get at least 70 stamps in our passports
Go fishing
Go hiking
Go camping
Write a musical
Go horse-back riding on the beach

(*Part A is my list, part B is a combined list for Husby and Wife)
((Also The Gulf of Mexico is bolded because we've been there together))

Weekend Listing is brought to you in part by: Anna Roberson, from whom I stole this idea; Stephen Cowden, with whom I plan on accomplishing a lot of these items; and readers like you!

Friday, April 9, 2010

Shoe Things

I have decided that one of the most uncomfortable things ever is having to walk around with a thing stuck in your shoe.

It's awful!

And it's even more painful/annoying when you are unable to stop and get the thing out of your shoe for a while.

Let's say you are on a first date. You want to make a good impression, right? He picked you up, you're headed to a nice restaurant, and you're excited. But on the way into the place, you get some thing stuck in your shoe. You can't shake your shoe out at the table; you would look silly. And you could excuse yourself to use the restroom, but you went to the restroom like 5 minutes ago and you don't want your date to think something is wrong with you. So you leave it in there. And then you have a super hard time paying attention to conversation, because all you can think about is having something stuck in your shoe.

Or let's say that you are at work. You decided to wear your cute boots and you are looking awesome. Then, you feel a little pebble or some thing stuck in your boot! Now you are really in a pickle. You can't take off your boot at work... It would look strange and be time-consuming. Someone might accuse you of being a 'time-thief'. So you leave it in, promising yourself you won't wear boots to work for a long time.

How about this: You are out walking your dog. Or to be more accurate, he is walking you. You are being pulled so quickly down the sidewalk that people look like peach-colored blurs in your peripheral. Suddenly you feel it: a stabbing thing is in your shoe. But can you top to remove said thing? NO! You are propelling down the street, at the mercy of your dog. You just pray that the thing doesn't rub a big hole in your foot till you get home!

Well, here is my story. I had a temporary job today. I wore little brown slip-on shoes with those knee-high nylon socks. The place I was working was not easy to find and I was running late and I was frustrated. And in my haste to get inside the building, I was careless. I stepped out of my shoe hurrying in, and a little pebble wedged itself in. Not in my shoe. No, this little thing got all the way into my nylon sock! How, you may ask?


But, there it was. And I couldn't very well roll up my pant leg and pull off the sock and shake it out right there in the front room of the office. So I left it there. Left it there for 9 hours.

It was truly, truly one of the longest days I have ever spent anywhere.

So here is my caution to you all: Step lightly. Avoid those things at all costs.

I have spoken.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Well, since I can't think of ANYTHING else...

I am blank-minded today. I can't think of anything to blog about... How sad.

I could talk about how awesome it was to get to spend about an hour and a half with my Mom, who flew through DFW on her way back to WA today.
We went to Whataburger and it rocked.
But there isn't much to say about it. Don't get me wrong, I'm so glad I got to see her! But that's really all there is to that story.

I could talk about the drive to and from DFW with Stephen.
We listened to his Summer Jamz CD and rocked out. Um...
And I'm out. We like driving together, but we don't talk much, we mostly sing along to the tunes. Not too exciting for readers.

I could talk about how it's my sister Rachael's 18th birthday tomorrow.
But I won't get to be there for the festivities. And I haven't seen her since my wedding. And I am pretty sad that I don't get to be in Washington for her 18th, so that might just turn out sad.

So, since I have nothing new to spin funny for you, I'll share with you a poem that I wrote about a year ago for a poetry class I was taking at SBU. This poem was actually written for a 'workshop class, where I wasn't getting a 'grade', which is why it is one of the few poems I've written that I actually like. All the ones I wrote for credit ended up being lame-o's. True story.

I hope you enjoy it:

An Address to the Prince

Doesn't it seem risky?
To place your whole future
on the hope that a shoe will fit only one girl?
And foolish, I think,
to believe that this slipper's size is unique,
since Betsy and I have the same size feet,
and you could stop at her house before mine.
Doesn't it seem
like you should be able to recognize
the girl with whom you danced,
and talked and laughed all night?

Of course,
I have the other shoe.
And I could step forward and prove
that I am the girl, the cause of this search.
But, if you aren't willing to risk, to find
me on your own--
if you are really going to place
all the weight on this shoe fitting
and nothing else--
I shouldn't want you anymore.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Another Public Service Announcement

Ladies and Gentlemen,

I have a confession to make that may be a bit startling:
I can't stand wearing real clothes anymore.
Pajamas are the new 'in' clothes for 2010.

Unemployment has spoiled me: I wake up in pajamas, shower, then put back on clean pajamas.

If I put on real clothes, it's cause I'm going outside. Grocery shopping, "job" interview (of which there have been shocking few), church, or walking in the evenings with Stephen: these are the only reasons I go outside.

Some of you may remember the Heather who never liked to look messy. She never liked to look unpolished, I suppose one could say. That Heather is gone.

Now, I get a little grumpy if I have to actually fix my hair and put on makeup and put on jeans or 'business casual' attire for a job-related thing. And as soon as I get home from being out, the first thing I do is put back on my PJ's.

And the truth of the matter is, especially now that it is warming up (significantly) in Texas, that pajamas are just more comfortable. Since I usually spend my (long) days lounging in our apt, waiting for Stephen to come home, pajamas are better for couch-sitting, tv-watching, internet-job-applying, and book-reading.

They are like comfort food, only I don't have to eat them to be happy.

I just wear my comfy shorts and soft shirts and I'm happier.

So I support pajamas, and not just at bedtime!
I have spoken.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010


Some days, it feels like I've eaten a lot of ice cream really fast.

Not so much in my tummy, but in my head.

Like I have constant brainfreeze.

I don't do much. I sit at home and apply for jobs and watch tv and read books.
My outlets for creativity are limited.

Some days, I just need an extra push.

For example, the day I wrote the story about Bebo and Baben; I was at "work" (a week-long temp job) and I was finished with the novel I took to read. So I was writing Stephen a note and I started writing the Bebo story.

In college, I had to be creative for my classes. I was graded on my creative prowess (I really just wanted to use the word 'prowess'). So I had an impetus, a reason to work my brain muscles.

Lately, I feel my brains turning into wet noodles. I can't seem to find the motivation to flex my intellectual muscles.

Part of me wants to go back to school, to get my Masters, just so I have something to do. I suppose a job would almost work as well, but since I'm looking for a receptionist-type job, I don't know how much I'll be challenged.

And I'm beginning to feel like I want to be challenged.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Summertime is a comin'

"I will live my life as a lobster-man's wife on an island in a blue bay. He will take care of me, he will smell like the sea, and close to my heart he'll always stay"*

For those of you who read my husband's blog, a few days ago he blogged about his
warm weather playlist. I contributed some ideas to his compilation, but he and I do have some differing tastes in music.

Thusly, I present Heather's Ideal Summertime Tunes!!!

1. A must-have on this playlist is Justin Timberlake. Super strong beats and his smooth voice make the ideal music for rolling down the windows and cruising. Personal favorites include Lovestoned, Rock Your Body, and Summer Love.
2. Matchbox Twenty is the ultimate in summer jams. Who doesn't love Real World, Disease, or 3AM? They take me straight back to the 90's and make me wanna rock out at a high school dance.
3. For something a little swingier, I've turned to a new favorite, Ingrid Michaelson. Some of my favorites include *Far Away, Highway, You and I, and of course, The Way I Am. She's got such a soft, smooth way with her music. It's warm and summery and I love it.
4. I would be lying to myself and to all of you if I didn't put John Mayer in my top 5. There is something about his voice and guitar and band that just smells like summer. I want to toss my sunglasses on and go lay on a beach and listen to Neon or My Stupid Mouth or most anything from Where the Light Is.
5. Kelly Clarkson is the summer between my 10th and 11th grade years; she is the summer between my senior year of high school and going off to college; she is the summer between my freshman and sophomore years in college. Basically, Kelly is summer. Breakaway and Thankful are my favorite CD's, but she's got some good ones from My December and I've even found a few I like from her newest CD All I Ever Wanted.

Of course, I could make a much longer list that included more specific songs, instead of artists. Songs like Flavor of the Week, Pinch Me Irreplaceable, Evacuate the Dancefloor, Good Girls Go Bad, Begin Again, Gold Digger, Slide, Crazy for this Girl, I Must Be Dreaming, and Come On Get Higher.
Or I could list more artists, like Jack Johnson, Colbie Caillat, Michael Buble, and the ever-awesome SmashMouth.

So there it is, folks. My happy list of summertime jams.

I have spoken.

(Anna Robertson can relate to my musical tastes and choices more than anyone else (because she is my song soul-mate) and I hope she thinks this list does my musical collection justice!)

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Weekend listing-- Easter edition!

Happy Easter!

Today's Easter listing is provided by my lovely and amazing friend, Janna Laugherty.

She happened to write me a list on facebook about how carrots mean Easter and I loved it so much, I asked her if I could share it with you!

Of course, she obliged, because she is so great.

So , to quote Janna:

"I am going to tell you how carrots mean Easter.
[clears throat here]

*Carrots are the food that rabbits eat
*Rabbits have a lot of babies
*Lots of babies means new life
*New life means somebody had to die
*Jesus died
*And came back to life
*To give us life
*Just like the baby rabbits have life
*Because their parents eat carrots.

And that my friend, is how carrots means Easter."

I feel super blessed to be spending Easter with my amazing husband. We went to church this morning, came home and cooked an Easter feast (it was good; included carrots!), and took an Easter nap.

TONIGHT!!!!!! Tonight, we are going to Colombus Avenue Baptist to see an African children's choir! I am so excited! At SBU, my favorite chapels were the ones with the children's choirs.
If they sing my favorite song tonight, I might just take one home.

Then, my loving husby will bring me home where we have a delicious strawberry cheesecake awaiting us in the refridgerator! What an Easter!

I hope you have a blessed Easter with your family and loved ones!

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Weekend listing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stephen and I have been married for almost 4 months.


I don't want this to be a super mushy blog, or even a slightly mushy blog, but I was thinking earlier about all the things that I like about being married to Stephen. And so, today's list will be my favorite thing about being married.

Don't worry, I promise 2 things:
A) Nothing will be said that will make anyone feel the need for the 'awkward turtle' signal and
B) I will do my best to still make you laugh

What I like about being married to Stephen Cowden:
1. I like that we go to the store together every time
2. I like that Stephen and I will sometimes randomly burst into synchronized song
3. I like that I can convince Stephen to "dance" while I record the moment
4. I like that Stephen will usually fill up my water glass without me asking
5. I like that we watch awesome TV shows together (The Office, HIMYM, Arrested Development)
6. I like that we take turns making each other dinner
7. I like that we wake up at the same time to have breakfast and coffee together
8. I like that we will sometimes blog about very very VERY similar things (see Stephen's post from last night and then see mine)
9. I like that Stephen runs around the apartment opening and closing windows, trying to chase away the heat, cause I hate being too warm!
10. I like that Stephen lets me make up 100000000 nicknames for him each day
11. I like that we brush our teeth at the same time
12. I like that we go for walks and get milkshakes
13. I like that Stephen asks me if he stinks, because he's concerned about not repelling me
14. I like that we play board games and when he beats me (and I get bitter), he pretends it was just luck
15. I like that we work on projects* together
16. I like that Stephen is kind of a music nerd and we can appreciate each others' musical preferences
17. I like that Stephen can pick up his guitar and play just about anything: popular songs, random songs on our iTunes, hymns, etc...
18. I like that I can be super sarcastic and Stephen will still love me
19. I like that Stephen jokes with my sisters and parents and friends, as if he's always been a part of my life
20. I like that Stephen sometimes asks me if we can name our kids things like Rupert and other various names
21. I like that Stephen can be really mature and really immature and sometimes in-between. It keeps life interesting
22. I like that Stephen lets me take pictures of him and put them in a facebook album called 'Husby'
23. I like that Stephen takes the laundry to the laundry room as long as I fold it when it is finished
24. I like that we usually eat dinner on the couch instead of at the table
25. I like that Stephen usually has the kitchen table covered with one project or another
26. I like that we plan our meals/grocery shopping trips before we go (and that he lets me include 1 or 2 impulse items)
27. I like that Stephen was genuinely excited when I got my $1 tax refund from the state of Missouri
28. I like that I don't know what life with Stephen will be like in 5, 10, or 50 years. I like knowing that our plans can change, we can be spontaneous, we can do what we want. But what I like most is knowing that, no matter what life looks like down the road, I'll have Stephen.

(Ok, so that last bit was mushy. Sorry. I tried)

*I was going to post a picture of our completed project from today, but poor Farmer is having trouble... Maybe later.

Friday, April 2, 2010


(For artistic purposes, please imagine me reading this to you with a British accent:)

This evening, I had the distinct pleasure of viewing one of my favorite movies with my charming husband, Earnest. Of course, his Christian name is actually Stephen, but it has always been a girlish fantasy of mine to love a man with the name Earnest. The name itself inspires absolute confidence.

Oscar Wilde's satirical masterpiece, The Importance of Being Earnest, is AMAZING!! I adore it. The play, in both script form and performed, is sublime. The movie is utterly impeccable. I especially acclaim Colin Firth's performance. He is superb.

(Ok, you can stop imagining my British accent now.)

I was all set to write a post about an amazing discovery. Stephen and I went for a walk this evening (It was gorgeous! About 70 with a cool breeze!) and we decided we wanted a cool treat. So we walked to Burger King (which is super close to our apt) and ordered milkshakes. They have an Oreo sundae shake right now, which is awesome, so I ordered that. And then, the woman asked me a question that changed my milkshake forever: "Vanilla, chocolate or strawberry?" What?!?!?! That's right folks, I was able to order a STRAWBERRY OREO SUNDAE shake. It was amazing. Like a little piece of heaven in this muggy, hot place (aka: Waco). Just delightful.

(And the British accent comes back here:)

So that was going to be my post... Until we came home and decided to watch The Importance of Being Earnest, which inspired me in several ways:

A: I began to talk with a British accent.
B: I have been calling Stephen 'Earnest'
C: I now have a new plan: to become a 'Bunburrist'!!

If you are unfamiliar with the play or movie, then I shall attempt to explain the Bunburry part, but the rest you'll have to see for yourself, and you should because it's wonderful:

In The Importance of Being Earnest, one of the main characters, Algernon Moncreiff, has created an invalid by the name of Bunburry so that he can escape life in the city and his Aunt- Lady Augusta Bracknell. Conversely, another character, Jack Worthing, has created a younger brother by the name of Earnest to escape life in the country and to see his love, Gwendolyn. Near the beginning of The Importance of Being Earnest, Algie (as he is commonly known) has accused Mr. Worthing of being "an advanced Bunburrist".

So here is my proposition: Earnest (Stephen) and I will create a "Bunburry" who likes to travel-to Missouri, to Oklahoma, to Illinois, to Washington- but they often fall ill in these places and require our immediate attention. It's flawless!

Bunburry-ing here we come!

I have spoken.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

April Fools?

Stephen thought that I should say that I am pregnant in my blog post tonight, to be followed quickly by "APRIL FOOLS!!", but I didn't think it was a good idea.

(I'm not. At all. Don't worry!)

However, this day does raise a question...

Why have a special day for pulling pranks on people? I'm usually opposed to practical jokes in general. I just don't think they are funny most of the time.

Well, to be honest, I like it when they happen to other people, or when I see them on tv or in movies. That's cool. But I'm not a fan when they happen to me.

Does this make me hypocritical? Maybe... I'm ok with that.

To steal from my sister's blog, we'll call this a borrowed "Talk Thursday".
Do you like April Fools Day/practical jokes?
Do you like them better if they happen to other people instead of you?
Do you like planning and delievering practical jokes?

Let's hear your thoughts!!