Saturday, May 29, 2010

I am old.

Yes, older than dirt.

I know I have written several posts about being old and stuff, and it's because I am super duper old feeling.

For example, I slept about 9 hours last night. And I woke up thinking, "What did I just do? I slept way too long!"

As a teen, you can never sleep too long.

Stephen and I worked at the bookstore this afternoon, 12-5, which is the whole time the store is open on Saturdays. We spent some time rearranging shelves and every time I knelt down, I creaked. And getting back up I creek ed.

I don't remember being so creaky as a teen.

This evening we went on a date. Yes, a Date. Dinner, ice cream, and a movie!

Dinner was BBQ from Uncle Dan's restaurant. While it was good, I had no veggies. This troubled me.

When a teen, no veggies = happy.

We went to see Iron Man 2. It was loud. I came home with a roaring headache. Literally, a lion is inside my head, roaring.

And then, I am sitting here typing this blog, and the light from my screen is killing me.

It's also past 11pm and I am sleepy.

I'M SO OLD.

I'm too old for this stuff: kneeling on the floor, no veggies at dinner, loud movies in the theatre.
I'm just too old for this stuff.

I am not, however, too old for: dates with my husband, vanilla Frostys, or texting my friends.

And now, I will move my old bones to bed. Partly cause I want to sleep instead of hear my headache-lion and partly cause I am old and sleepy and have to get up early.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Musical life

I have this secret desire.

I want to be in a Broadway musical.

Don't laugh. It's true.

Now, I realize that for the last several years I have been slightly adamant about the fact that I no longer enjoy singing in public.

That is still very very true.

However, I can't help it.

Whenever I'm alone in the apartment, I crank up some tunes and I sing my little heart out.

Mostly in the shower, but still.

Or in the car, when I'm driving somewhere without Stephen (which isn't often) I like to belt it out.

The closest I've come to really singing in public in the last 2 years is at the karaoke bar with my sister Sarah.

But that doesn't really count. (It doesn't count as singing in public unless at least half, no, at least 3/4 of the audience is sober.

And yet, there is a very strong part of me that wants to perform again.

One of the happiest times of my life was during the 2 weeks of performances for Children of Eden, the musical I was in my senior year of high school.

Music wise, it was the best performance experience of my life.

Every night, I would go in and do my makeup and put on my costume for the first part of act 1. And the show night high would start.

And then I'd start to drag just before intermission.

But in the opening number of act 2, I'd get my second wind and I'd feel even higher than in act 1.

And then, at the end, when we all stood and took our bows, it just felt magical.

There is something magical about being on stage.

It was a high I'd not felt until those 2 weeks and I haven't felt it since.

Performing in a choir/ensemble isn't the same.

In the musical, I got to be someone else. I felt what that character felt through the music.

When I sing show tunes in the shower, or when I'm cleaning the kitchen, I get to pretend that I am in this other place and that I am someone else.

It's freeing.

So there you have it.

My dark secret, that isn't a secret anymore, because I posted it on my blog.

I'm pretty sure I won't be in a Broadway musical. Shoot, I doubt I'd even have the courage to audition for one.

And I suppose I could try to do community theatre or something.

But it's not the same.

The big production, the fancy lights and sets, the feel of the big audience, the band or orchestra playing...

I guess I'll just watch Glee instead!

Friday, May 21, 2010

Woe is me...

I had a request from my lovely friend, Janna Laugherty, asking me to post on my blog again.

But, alas, I have terrible news.

I have nothing to blog about these days.

There, I said it! And I'll say it again: I have nothing to blog about these days.

Sure, things happen. I go to work, I make dinner, I hang out with my husband.

Here is what I think has happened:

I have a job now. And therefore I am around people more.

So I use up all my funny around the people that I work with during the day.

When I started at the bookstore, I was one of 4 new hires. 1 guy and 2 other girls started at the same time I did.

And, of course, there were the people who already worked there, mostly guys (including Stephen) and one other girl.

Every one has been super friendly and we've gotten to be decent acquaintances.

So during a shift, when there is a lull in the store, or when we are arranging shelves or putting away books, we get to chatting.

As you all know, and probably know well, I like to make people laugh.

My mother tells me that I am "famous" for my one-liners, and I take pleasure from eliciting laughter, especially unexpected laughter.

Therefore, it stands to reason that I spend all my funny lines, stories, or jokes on my co-workers.

And when I get home, stories from the bookstore don't seem funny when re-told in blog form, and I am at a loss for something to share with the world wide web.

Here is a list of what I did today (just so you can see what I'm talking about):
1. I woke up.
2. I cleaned the ants out of the shower (again)
3. I showered
4. I woke up Stephen
5. I fixed my hair and put on makeup
6. I put breakfast together (coffee and cereal)
7. I dried my hair
8. I checked facebook
9. I dried my hair more
10. I went to work
11. I worked; For the first couple hours, I watched the front of the store and read a book about Helen of Troy. Then I worked with Stephen to remove old stickers from some textbooks
12. At noon, Stephen and I went to lunch
13. I went back to work at 1245
14. I peeled more stickers off of books
15. I went home at 3
16. I watched the entire 2nd disk of How I Met Your Mother season 1 and made dinner while I waited for Stephen to get home (at 6)
17. We ate dinner
18. I talked to Sarah (my sister) and Stephen talked to his family
19. We went to Wal-Mart
20. Stephen bought me a Frappuccino from Starbucks
21. We came home and put away our Wal-Mart purchases
22. I sat on the couch, drank my Frappuccino and checked facebook
23. I noticed Janna's request for a new blog post

And now we've come full circle.

I believe that this is enough evidence for you all to believe that I am speaking truth when I say I have nothing to blog about these days.

So, if it is another week or two before I post, I apologize.

If you need someone to blame, blame my co-workers.

Or move here. Then you'd get to be here and hang out with me instead of having to wait for my blog to make you laugh.

Cause you know if you were here, I'd make you laugh.

I have spoken.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

What I have learned from marriage:

In my five months of marriage, I have learned many things.

Many things.

I could make a list of all the things I have learned so far, but instead, I will focus on an aspect that has surprised me recently.

If you have ever lived with me (and about 1/2 of the readership of my blog has lived with me: my mom, Sarah, Janna, Anna, Stephen), then you know that I enjoy my alone time.

I have always liked to have time to myself and time to do my own thing. Some might call me independent.

But lately, I've realized that I need a lot less alone time than I used to.

It's strange.

For the first month of our marriage, Stephen and I didn't have jobs. We spent time organizing our new apartment and trying to figure out Waco.

And then even after Stephen got his part-time job at the bookstore and I was looking for a job, we still spent a lot of time together.

So I suppose that I grew used to having him around. When he'd go to work, I'd be stuck at home. Sure, putting in online applications took up some time and so did facebook. But eventually, I'd run out of things to do.

And it wasn't just that I'd get bored, it was that I got tired of being alone.

This is a very odd thing for me to discover about myself.

I never used to mind being alone.

I had my own room the first year I lived in the dorm at SBU.

And I'm sure my former roommates can all vouch for the fact that I liked to go into my room and read or study and just be alone for a while.

And Stephen has ruined that.

Maybe when I get a full-time job, I can go back to having some independence.

Or maybe once I make friends here in Waco, I'll start to want my alone time again.

Any of my current friends want to move to Texas???

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Think about it...

Well, I did it.

I finally had my hairs cut.

Here is the sad thing: I called, like, 7 salons.

I tried to be very thorough. I wanted someone who knew curly hair and could cut it well.

And I found a woman who has curly hair and said she has curly headed clients and has been hair cutting for 16 years.

I thought, "Yay! She will understand and do a good job!"

So I made the appointment, went to the salon, met this woman.

She had stick straight hair.

First of all, I think it is sad when people boast about having curly hair but they straighten it all the time.

NO ONE IN THE SALON KNEW SHE HAD CURLY HAIR!

What does this tell me? Either she really hated her curls or she never learned to manage them.

Secondly, I explained (in great detail) what I usually get, what I like, what I dislike, and how I wanted her to cut my hair.

She listened pretty well, and for the most part I think I like the cut.

However, she overlooked a very very crucial part of my directives: Shape.

Curly hair, when cut straight across or cut without a slight layering effect looks like a box.

This is how my hair now looks.

Like a box.

I told her that I usually have my hair cut in a subtle V shape, so as to give it shape (and to prevent it from looking like an overgrown mullet (which I thought went without saying) but apparently I needed to have said this out loud) and when my hair was still wet I could not tell very well how this task was accomplished.

It was not done at all, I fear.

Now, maybe my hair is just in shock. I have had this problem before, when I have had several inches taken off my hair, and it goes into severe shock.

This could be the case.

But I couldn't resist looking at pictures from my last 2 hair cuts and they looked sooooo much better than this one!

It was cheap-ish though. For a curly hair cut. $20. Not bad at all.

So, if in the next few days, I'm not completely satisfied with my purchase, I'll just scoot back to the store and get a refund. (Or I'll just ask her to fix it a little)

I'd attempt to fix it myself, but I think the word *DISASTER* says it all.

Me, scissors, and my hair is a Bad (with a capital B) Idea (with a capital I).


In other news, Stephen bought me A.A. Milne's The House at Pooh Corner and a package of mini-pens. Happy!

I love miniature things! Just ask Stephen: anytime we go anywhere, if I see something little, it's cute and I want it.

I don't know when this started or why, but who cares?

Little things are awesome.

And cute. Like teacup pigs.

Maybe, another time, I'll do a whole post about tiny things. But for tonight, I'll say goodnight. Maybe post some new hair cut pictures tomorrow!

GOOD NIGHT BLOG!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

**Special Mother's Day Weekend Listing**

Today, my loving husband and I went grocery shopping at Wal-Mart.

We basically had no groceries in the house, so we piled items high on the rolly-register thing.

I think the cashier woman felt like she needed to talk to us, maybe because we had so much stuff or maybe because she is just a friendly person, but at any rate, the first thing she said to me was, "Are you a mother?"

AHHHHHHHHH!
That's what happened in my head.

I think I blushed and sputtered until Stephen said, no we've only been married about 5 months; if she was a mom, we'd be in trouble!

Then we all awkwardly laughed.

But it made me think:

Though I am not a mother, I am very thankful for mine and for Stephen's and for all my friends mothers, because without them I wouldn't have me, my husband, or any of my friends!

So, in honor of my mother, Juanita Lewis, who is, in my opinion, a truly amazing momma, this Sunday my weekend listing is a tribute to her awesomeness:

Top 10 reasons my mom is awesome:
10. She has aged gracefully, so I know that as I get older I'll look good.

9. She is the smartest person I know. Any time I have a problem or a question, I go to her first... (After I've talked to Stephen.)

8. Somehow she finds time to be a great mother, wife, daughter, friend and supervisor at work. (I don't know how she does it!)

7. She is an encourager. To everyone. Not just me, but to EVERYONE. She writes me little notes or calls and leaves me messages to let me know I'm loved and she's proud of me and she's praying for me. She does it for Stephen now too.

6. She used to scratch my back while I was going to sleep. :)

5. She always has time for me. Even if it's not right at that moment, she'll make time
for me later.

4. The only way she will jump into water is if she can do a somersault.

3. She made up a song to sing to us at night.

2. She has the greatest and most contagious laugh ever.

And the number 1 reason my mom is awesome is:
She loves me soooooooooooo much!

There are at least a bazillion other things I could list, so this is just a short summary.

I love you Mom! And to all mothers, Happy Mother's Day.

And to those of you who aren't yet mothers, I plan on staying that way for a while...
How 'bout you?

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Joy in the little things--

So yesterday, Stephen and I both worked over 8 hours at the bookstore.

It was a LONG day.

So when we got home, we wanted to unwind and spend some time together, and be able to talk about something besides textbooks...

We watched a little TV, ate dinner and decided to play Skip-Bo.

In case you don't know Stephen or me at all, I'll let you in on a little secret:

We are VERY competitive people.

Our game-playing usually ends with one of us very frustrated and one of us very smug. And it does differ, depending on the game we play.

Skip-Bo is usually a better choice, because we win pretty evenly.... But not last night.

No, last night, I beat Stephen. Beat him good.

And in his frustration, he threw his remaining card up in the air, as so many *cough*sorelosers*cough* do....

Instead of flipping to the table, it did a graceful 180 and hit him square in the eye.

Not the eye lid. Not his eye lashes. Not his eyebrow.

In the eye.

And he had on his GLASSES!

In the irony of the moment, I will admit that I laughed. A lot. And then I asked him if he was ok. and then I laughed some more. In fact, I laughed so hard I cried.

It was good. It was needed. It's been a long week and a lot of working hours.

Even though the laugh was at the expense of my husband's eye, I'm sure he would say it was worth it, and needed too.

If any of you had a long week and needed a laugh, I hope this story helped. If not, I'm sorry. And if it's not that funny, I apologize. I was really tired last night and I am pretty tired tonight. And I still think it was hilarious.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Five Stages

This Sunday's edition of Weekend Listing is going to be a sad one.

Today, I have gone through the five stages of grief:

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

Why, you ask? What has happened to cause me to go through all these stages in once day?

Well, I'll tell you.

This morning, my hair dryer would not work.

Stage 1: Denial
After I put on my makeup, I picked up my hair dryer to dry my hair before church. I made sure it was plugged in first. Then I flipped the little switch. Nothing happened. So I reached up (I was upside down with my glasses off) and made sure it was all the way plugged in and pushed that little red button. Still nothing. So I unplugged it and plugged it in again and pushed the little red button. Still nothing. So I straightened up and put on my glasses and called for Stephen. I said that the outlet wasn't working. So I went out into our room and tried the outlet by my closet. Still nothing. I unplugged and plugged it, and again pushed that little red button. Again, nothing. So Stephen took it into the other bathroom and tried it. I began to feel a sinking feeling in my stomach. He came back and said the 2 saddest words you can hear about a hair dryer, "It's dead."

Stage 2: Anger
I froze for a moment. Then the madness welled up. Of course the hair dryer (that I've had for about 2 years) would decide not to work on a Sunday morning when I need to dry my hair to go to church!! How dare it stop working!! Now I would have to figure out a way to put my hair up with those little clips (that hurt my head after a few hours) really fast, cause we had to leave soon! I contemplated throwing that un-handy device clear across the room. And then I had a thought...

Stage 3: Bargaining
Maybe it wasn't really all the way dead. Maybe I could find a plug somewhere in the apartment that could make it come back to life. Maybe I just didn't press the little red button enough times. Maybe ALL the outlets in the apartment were burnt out and nothing worked. Maybe we just needed to flip the fuse!

Stage 4: Depression
As I realized that all of these suggestions were ludicrous, I almost started to cry. A woman grows to depend on her hair dryer. It's a source of comfort to know that it will be there, working properly in the morning. It becomes a part of the routine. So when it malfunctions (or in my case, just stops turning on) it's both shocking and very very sad... And to make matters worse, not only was my hair dryer sitting in the trash can, I had to go to church with wet hair! These thoughts were enough to make me want to lay back down and cry instead of going to church.

Stage 5: Acceptance
But, eventually, I came to realize that this was not the end of the world. I could put my hair up with the little clips. No, it wouldn't look super great, but at least I wouldn't have wet hair down my back. At least I could throw in a cute headband to distract from the fact that my hair had not been dried properly. At least Stephen and I could go to Wal-Mart later to buy me a new hair dryer so that I don't have to go to work tomorrow with wet hair. So I clipped up my hair and we left for church (only a few minutes later than Stephen wanted to leave).

So that is my Sunday morning saga.

It was sad, yes, but I triumphed.

And here is the moral of the story:

One might consider having an extra hair dryer on hand for those unforseen circumstances.

I have spoken.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

The time has come, my friends, to talk of other things...

Of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of cabbages and kings!
And why the sea is boiling hot, and whether pigs have wings...

And so my friends, it's time for me to silence all the rumors.
No, I didn't meet a hit man; no, I didn't show folks my bloomers.

I simply was hired to do a job, and in return get paid.
That's really all there is to it. (I got tired of rhyming)

Ok, here's the scoop:

A few days ago, I applied to work at the textbook store where Stephen works. Their buy-back season is approaching (and will start next week) and they needed extra people. So I applied.

I interviewed on Thursday, the manager called me yesterday and offered me the job and I went in and did paperwork and learned stuff for a few hours.

I worked a 5 hour shift today (with Stephen) and am now mostly trained on using their cash register. It helps that is is very similar to the one I used when I worked at Maurices.

For right now, I get to work at the bookstore where Stephen is, since they need the extra people for buy-back, but if they keep me after the 2 week rush, then I'll be moved to the Spirit Shop, which is the same company, but they carry more clothing and other stuff, as well as textbooks.

However, I also have an interview at Baylor (on Wednesday) for a full-time job. From what I gathered, they are interviewing a LOT of people and I'm not too confident that I'll be chosen (they are looking for some experience I don't have, but they did call me for an interview, so who knows, right?)

But the important part is: I have a job. It's nice. The people who work there are friendly, I love having a reason to go outside the apartment, and I get paid.

And I get to work with Stephen.

I'm not gonna lie-- it was a little awkward when I first got to the store today. When I went in yesterday to start to familiarize myself with everything, Stephen wasn't there. But he's been working there a few months now, so everyone knows him. I was able to break the ice with my new co-workers a little by talking about Stephen and joking about him. So that made yesterday easier.

Today was stranger.

Stephen and I have been married for about 4.5 months now. We don't hang out with other people. Church is about the only other time that we interact with people together. Obviously, he does at work, but I've not been there. Until today.

I was a little stunned by his professional coolness toward me. Not that he was mean or ignored me-- he was just cold-ish.

I'm so used to him being sweet and affectionate and teasing and silly.
I was not prepared for business Stephen.

It took me a little while to be ok when he would try to explain things (in a basic way) without me thinking he was patronizing me. Or for me to be comfortable with him watching me do a transaction. Or for me to not blush when I had to ask him something I didn't know how to do or had forgotten from the previous day.

I think this working together will be fine. It's just going to take getting used to, mostly for me, I think. He seemed fine.

At any rate, I'm happy to have work and to get a paycheck. Stephen and I both have more than 40 hours next week, which is awesome. If he were working that much and I weren't doing anything but sitting at home, I'd go crazy.

So, my friends (and Anna Robertson), you now know the full story of my employment!

Wish me luck!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

I quit...

Well, peeps, I tried.

But I think that I am letting go of my dream.

That is, my dream to blog every day until I get a job.

I just don't have that much to day these days, and rather than waste my time trying to come up with a post that's just short and lame and waste your time with something not worth reading, I'll only blog when I actually have something interesting to blog about.

:)

Sorry if this comes as a disappointment. I know, I know-- reading my blog was the highlight of your day, but think how much better it will be when it becomes rare!

That's right, I'm building the tension!

Loves~

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

The vanity continues:

Once again, this post is dedicated to my sister, Sarah Lewis:

I was going through this box of old cards and notes and such, because I am a major pack-rat and I felt like purging.

So it was while rummaging through this random box of hilarious memories that I stumbled upon this note.

I am an avid note writer. I wrote lots of notes in high school to friends in different classes, I wrote notes to folks in college, and I continue to write little notes to Stephen every once in a while.

This is one of the few notes I've received from Sarah. And here is why I kept it-- on the back of this note, she wrote me a poem. It cracked me up then, it cracked me up 5 minutes ago when I read it again, and I am hoping it will make you all laugh as well.

I also hope she does not mind me sharing this.... But it's so much more amusing than anything I could come up with today:

A POEM:

20 minutes to go
Can I make it? Probably so.
I miss your face, but by God's grace
I'll see you soon.
Last night I had a dream
(not like Martin Luther King's)
In my dream I had a baby
She was tiny and lived in water
I know, I know it's crazy, but I
surely loved my little daughter.
Adina kept screaming about a man in her bed,
I just wanted to hit her in the head.
That was my dream-- crazy as it may seem.
I'll go... pay attention now
And I'm tried of rhyming, so I don't care.
Poem over.

(In case some folks don't know, Adina was Sarah's college roommate)

I hope you enjoy this poem. I do!!

And Sarah, if I had seen this note on Sunday, it would have made it into the top 25 list. :)

Sunday, April 25, 2010

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Today, in honor the 25th birthday of my awesome sister, Sarah, our Sunday edition of Weekend Listing is a tribute to her greatness!

Also, this is Sarah's Golden Birthday, which is even specialer, so:

I will now list the 25 greatest memories I have of Sarah~

1. We have a home video of Sarah telling jokes from when she was 3 or 4, I think. The whole thing is amusing, but the best part is when Sarah tells this joke: "And the horse kissed the cat!" And then she laughs and says, "Huh, huh huh? Did you geeeet it?"

2. At one point during our childhood, Sarah had an iguana named Zeke. There are pictures somewhere that show this iguana in Sarah's hair. I wish I knew where that picture is today.

3. Sarah usually got along great with animals, but one time our cat Roo was trying to sit on her stomach while she was trying to homework. So Sarah pushed Roo off of her bed. Roo jumped back up and sprayed her in the face, so Sarah drop-kicked him down the hall.

4. There is an awesome aquarium in Vancouver, Canada and our family used to go up there during the summers when we were young. Our favorite exhibit was the beluga whale exhibit. One time, we were watching the beluga show and Sarah picked out her favorite beluga, Nanoo Nanoo. After the show, we went down to the railing to look at the whales. This part is a little fuzzy; I'm not sure if she said the whale's name or if it swam up to us on it's own, but it spit a stream of water right at Sarah. Freaked her out!

5. That same day, a black squirrel stole her hot dog while it was in her hands. And then, after she ran off screaming, it went back for her bag of Cheetos.

6. Our dad bought a boat when we were in late elementary school or junior high, and Sarah was fearless. I have lots of memories of her learning to water ski or just riding in the inner-tube for fun.

7. A few summers, Sarah and I went to a church camp on Mt. Baker. They did a 5 am Polar Bear Plunge and I am pretty sure that Sarah participated.( It's one of the reasons I think you are brave, so if this isn't true, Sarah, I wouldn't refute it)

8. In junior high, Sarah was on the drill team for a year, which was like a dance team. She learned a routine to Britney Spears's song Crazy. I can still picture her practicing the moves in the basement. Of course, that may be because every once in a while she tries to see if she can still remember them. I bet after she reads this, she'll try to do the steps... (You'll admit it if I'm right, right Sarah?)

9. In high school, Sarah was given a jeep-type car, a Dihatsu Rocky. It earned many nicknames in the time she had it, but the best one was the Jesus Jeep.

10. Sarah broke her ankle while diving off a lifeguard stand in junior high. In high school, she had to have surgery to fix something with the growth plate in her ankle. Her anesthesiologist was a man, who was unacquainted with women, and he could not remove her bra. She told me this story while still groggy from the anesthesia, so that may be why I think it is so funny.

11. Our church did a children's musical (eons ago) called Good King's Come in Small Packages, and Sarah had the lead. I believe her name was Elizabeth. She was good.

12. Somewhere, Sarah found this awful sparkly spandexy crazy colored costume thing. She would put it on and perform Michael Bolton's classic hit, Love Is A Wonderful Thing with a hairbrush for a microphone. I wish I had a photo of her in this outfit, but the only one I could find was of my ex-boyfriend in the costume... And no one wants to see that.

13. A few Christmases ago, I took Sarah to get her ears pierced. I think I was more scared for her than she was for herself. I'd had mine pierced 2 years before, I think, and the people who took me kept telling me that it wouldn't hurt and it hurt bad. So I told her that I was going to be honest with her and tell her it hurt. A lot. But she was cool as a cucumber.

14. Stephen likes to tease me and Sarah, because our conversations are about 23% real life and 77% TV shows. It's a funny way to communicate, but we like it, cause we both like to laugh. And we typically find the same things in a show funny.

15. Sarah does an amazing karaoke rendition of Queen's Fat-Bottom Girls. It's pretty legendary. I mean, if you haven't seen it, you need to add it to your bucket list.

16. Our old church, Celebration Community, used to go on church retreat weekends. The best place was called Black Lake. Again, I have lots of memories from there, but the best one is the year that Sarah wrote a "Veggietales" skit for us young kids to perform and we wore red and green sleeping bags for Bob and Larry.

17. Sometime during high school, Sarah had to have surgery for a deviated septum. If you know me well, you know that I do not do well with blood. But Sarah's bandages had to be changed regularly and I had to help. This probably sounds like a gross memory, but for some reason I remember it with some gladness. I think it was the first time I felt like Sarah needed me to help her. She's super independent and I know that is part of the reason I am super independent.

18. When I was a freshman at SBU, Sarah took me to my first SBU football game. I was so badly sunburned that I could only wear 1 type of shirt-- i.e. the shirt type I had on when I got burned. But Sarah was so nice. She went to the store and got me lotion and she made fun of me less than anyone else.

19. Sarah likes to send me about a thousand text messages on my birthday. She's done this every year since we were given cell phones. And we got cell phones for Christmas my freshman year of college. I've actually saved some cause they are so funny.

20. In Sarah's sophomore year of college, she brought a few friends to Seattle for Spring Break. I have so many funny memories of her from that trip, but my favorite was when we went to Ft. Casey and had a random song-time in one of the bunkers.

21. One time when Sarah came home from college on break, she taught a few of us at church an 'interpretive dance' to Avalon's Testify to Love. We performed it at a church, not our church. I wish someone had video-taped that!

22. My senior year of high school, I was in a musical. Sarah was still at SBU when it started, and I really wanted her to make it home for at least 1 of the shows. It was either the night before closing night, or closing night that Sarah made it home and was able to go to my show. I was glad that other people were there, but having her there was most important to me.

23. During the HORRIBLE ice storm in Bolivar, January of 2007, the power went off in my dorm. Sarah came to pick me up in her Cadillac and let me stay at her apt with her 2 roommates. We played lots of card games.

24. One year, when we were in Bolivar, for Sarah's birthday, we had dinner at Red Robin and then we went mini-golfing. I'm pretty sure that at one point Sarah got so bored she laid down on the course. Or maybe she was just tired. But I have this mental image of her lying on the green AstroTurf.

25. When Stephen and I went to Seattle the week before our wedding, Sarah did all that she could to spend time with us. We had early Christmas, went light looking, had Kau-Kau downtown. And she took us karaoking. I know Stephen did not love it like I did, but karaoke with Sarah is one of the best things ever.

There are about 23 years of memories that could have made it into this list and I wish I could name more. Because my sister is super fantastic. I am pretty lucky to have her. We did not always get along (I mean, we are sisters). But, I am not only proud to call her sister, I am proud to call her a friend.

I hope this list makes you laugh and does not make you want to punch me, Sarah! This is just a sample of the fun times I have shared with you and I look forward to many years more!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Saturday, April 24, 2010

I have the attention span of a... OH! Glitter!

My attention span has greatly shortened since my graduation from SBU.

I could blame this on my husband, but I think the blame lies with Texas.

And I thought I had a short attention span in college.

It's true. I did my fair share of procrastinating. I focused in classes pretty well, I think. Unless it was choir with Dr. Campbell. Oops.

But my attention is diverted so quickly now! And I think it's because I have been bored so often. While Stephen is at work, I search for jobs and play on FB. That's about it.

Sure, I clean up the apt, but it doesn't get too messy when I'm cleaning it 2 or 3 times a day...

We don't do a big breakfast or lunch, so I don't have much to do for or after those meals.

I've read all the books in my personal library since we moved here. But it took me DAYS to finish some books. Which is just silly, cause I used to be able to sit and read for hours! Just this week, I started reading The Great Gatsby, which is one of my favorites. I've had to stop after every chapter and do something else. I just can't get hooked. Maybe it's cause I've read it so many times?

Stephen's attention span has decreased too, but I don't think he is as bad as me yet. We sometimes watch a movie with or after dinner, but in the last 2 weeks we haven't made it straight through any of them. We pause them and do other things. Tonight we watched X-Men III: The Last Stand, and I think we paused it about 8 times. To make dinner, to get seconds, to refill our water, to clean up after dinner, to go to the bathroom, to frost a cake I made earlier today (strawberry with chocolate frosting! YUM.), to play on FB. And it's been this way for weeks.

When did I put up the post about our super secret project? Um, like a month ago?? Yeah, it's still not done. I think we work on it maybe every other day... Maybe. We sit down to work on it and end up having staring contests or with Stephen asking for a back rub or me asking him to scratch my back...

I try to listen to music... but I always feel like I need to do something with my hands or sing really really loudly. I usually opt for sing really really loudly, until I fear people 6 blocks away can hear me. But I tend to view this like a child: if I can't see them, they can't hear me.

The last 2 or 3 days, I haven't even had the focus to write a full blog post for all of you! I'd be so distracted that it would be 11:30 before I'd remember I hadn't blogged and then I'd type some silly little nothing just so I could say I blogged... I apologize, loyal fans. I apologize.

And I know what you are thinking, "Today is Saturday! Where is my super favorite Weekend Listing??" Well, I am so attention-diverted that I didn't realize I should be typing a Weekend Listing till I hit enter after that last paragraph... Boo.

Ok, Weekend Listing, Weekend Listing... What can I list??

Got it! Here are the top five places I wish I could go out to eat:
5. Panera
4. Chipotle
3. Red Robin
2. Coldstone Creamery
And the number one place: Outback Steakhouse!

I know, that was like the lamest WL ever, but you all love me! So it's ok.

And now I must leave.

Turtle!
Umbrella!
Whiskey!

P.S. A special shout-out to my super awesome sister, Sarah, who has been GBWE-ing (Golden Birthday Weekend Extravaganza) it up this weekend (and will continue tomorrow) in honor of her 25th birthday! Sister, tomorrow I will have a very special Weekend Listing-Sunday style- in honor of you! Check it out!

Friday, April 23, 2010

They call me Eeyore:

"I cannot blog tonight," says I,
For if I do, I fear I'll cry.

And then my blog would no longer be funny;
for crying makes my nose more runny.

I've no jokes to tell, or stories, or songs.
My brain is mushed up, like stir-fry in tongs.

I know that I vowed to blog daily until
"Regular work!" I could happily peal.

But, my dear friends, I spoke a bit too soon,
for my life is more dull than I once assumed.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Because I am too tired to actually try:

If only we were llama

No matter if we knew how to place a comma

Although we couldn't wear pajama

And have no fingers for Bowl-a-Rama

I'd be happy with having less drama

Can you imagine a llama Obama?

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

I've only got 4 minutes!

To be able to say I wrote a post today, I would have to finish and publish it in the next 4 minutes.

I don't know if I'll make it.

And even if I do, it will only be nonsense.

Not that my posts are super meaningful now, but at least they are usually cohesive.

If I were really creative, I'd write a quick Dr. Seuss-type poem that would make you all laugh so hard you cry.

But I've only got 2 minutes left...

Actually, make that one.

Ok, so I'm out of things.

I'm publishing this!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Does it surprise you I got hooked?

GLEE!

It's true, I watch Glee. And I like it.

I like the music, the twists on songs, and the vocals are pretty good.

Would I be disappointed if there was less drama? NO! But I'll watch it even if there is drama.

I liked this week's episode. It was Madonna-inspired. I'm not a huge Madonna fan, but I know some of the songs and like some of the songs.

But it was the Glee-twist that I really liked.
And I liked that there was more singing-less drama this week. Of course there are the classic love/drama elements, which are mostly annoying at this point, and the rivalry thing, which is also old. But the show is best when it focuses on music and not drama, and I think they are getting into that rhythm better with this season.

Also, I love the guest starts!

Season one brought Kristin Chenoweth, one of my all-time favorite performers. She was the original Galinda/Glinda in Wicked, one of my favorite musicals. I liked her on Glee! And I saw that she is going to be on again next week and I am super excited.

Last week, Idina Menzel was on, and she is also incredible. I wish they'd had her sing! She was the original Elphaba/Wicked Witch in Wicked, along-side Kristin Chenoweth. I think it would be super amazing if they were on the show together!

But, I am most excited for NPH! That's right, Neil Patrick Harris is supposed to appear on Glee this season and I CAN'T WAIT! I adore NPH. I think he is so talented and soooo hilarious. I think it is apparent that I am stoked for his appearance.

I have downloaded a ton of Glee song-versions from iTunes and I must say, I listen to them a lot. I think if I had known about Glee before it started, I would have wanted to audition. Glee is so my kind of thing. I loved singing in high school and I wish we'd had a show choir. I did musical theatre, which was AMAZING, but I think show choir is more my taste.

I love musicals and I am constantly wishing that my life was more like a musical. I don't sing as much (or as well) as I used to, and I miss it.

So I'll live vicariously through Glee. At least, as far as the singing goes.

And when I'm alone, I'll belt my favorite musical tunes and pretend I'm in a crowded hallway somewhere where no one notices me singing a poignant ballad.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Let's hear it for the coffee...

I love my husband a lot.

I love him even more than I love coffee.

And there are few things in this world that I love more than coffee.

I LOVE COFFEE.

If you've been around me in the morning, you know that I am happiest if I get about a cup and a half of the good stuff.

If you've hung out with me in the late afternoon or early evening, you know that there are few desserts that compare with a fancy cup of joe (Unless there's cheesecake or ice cream, I'm having coffee).

Coming from the land o' Starbucks, Seattle, where there literally IS a Starbucks on every corner, has made me appreciate this delicious beverage.

Cold, with ice, frappucchino style, hot, with ice cream floating in it, with whip, different flavors, with syrup, with drizzle: the possibilities are limitless.

The only way I don't like coffee is plain. Or with too much caramel. I'm not a fan.

Some have hypothesized that perhaps I like the fancy flavorings and not the actual coffee.
But I must refute this theory.

That is like saying that I like the icing more than I like the cake.
Or that I like the music but not the lyrics.
It would be like loving the Bel and Biv but not De Voe.

It just doesn't work.

All those fancy toppings and flavors are nothing without good coffee at the center!

When Stephen and I were in Bolivar and in Cleveland, we bought whole coffee beans and ground them ourselves (well, with a grinder). If we had yucky beans, no matter how much creamer or sugar we put into it, it was still bad coffee. If we had good beans, we could put just a touch of creamer and sugar and the coffee would be fabulous.

Now that we are in Waco, we've found a brand of already ground coffee that we like. And we still get different creamer flavors, but it's the coffee that makes it yummy.

Plus, the caffeine side affects are fun. Stephen gets "coffee hyper" and likes to be creative and crazy (and sometimes he gets obnoxious). I think I am pretty much the same.... Well, maybe I get a little hyper...

We'll call this my ode; my ode to coffee.

'How do I love thee, Coffee?
Let me count the ways;
I love thee for making my breakfast yummier,
For being the reason I can stay awake on rare days I go to work,
Because without you, I'd laugh a lot less at Stephen,
For being warm and cozy in the winter,
For being cold and refreshing in the summer.
Oh, Coffee, I love thee for all these reasons.
And so many more!

Coffee is awesomeness times a bazillion, and if you don't already love it, you should.

I have spoken.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Weekend listing??

I know you are all curious.


"Will Heather post a Weekend listing today??"


Be curious no longer; it's time for Weekend Listing -- Sunday style!


Tonight's list is inspired by some of my very bestest friends:

Anna Robertson, Janna Laugherty, Kristin Edwards, Emily Iler, and of course, my husband Stephen.


I miss my friends. They are amazing! I think that is part of the reason I am so reluctant to make friends here in Waco. I like the ones I already have; I don't want new ones!


So I am going to list one of my favorite memories with each of these hilarious and wonderful and awesome people:


1. Kristin: There was the one time when we went to the City Museum in St. Louis. For some reason, you and I wandered away from the group and went into the creepy carnivally part. We sat in an old bumper car and proceeded to try and make it move for like half an hour. A couple of guys sitting at a nearby table got hit more than once and looked at us like we were nuts. We didn't care. It was just so funny. And now we have the picture of us in the bumper car to remember that time forever!!


2. Janna: There was the time I stayed at your house for Thanksgiving. We made like 6 happy mix CD's for the drive to Peoria and we went to see Enchanted 3 times in the theatre! We also made puppy chow and watched Hairspray with your sisters. Madison asking about the flasher will always make me laugh! We watched a ton of other movies and both bought copies of Joe vs. the Volcano. That was a very happy week of Janna-time.


3. Anna: There was that time when we were roommates and, while a lot of hilarious stuff happened when we lived together, my favorite night was the night we held hands and told each other funny elementary school stories and then sang like 2 NSYNC songs. We stayed up talking super late and we kept laughing and Kristin and Janna finally had to tell us to shush cause we were being super loud. That, my friend, was legendary!


4. Emily: There was the time when you and I drove to meet in the middle-of-nowhere Kentucky last summer so that we could hang out for a few hours. The town had all those pigs and we walked around those antique stores and you bought me that hideous/gorgeous ring! (I still wish the flower hadn't fallen off..) We ate at Sonic and talked about nothing and everything and life and our other friends and how much we missed those SBU times when we were all together. It was happy and so amazing to see you. The only stinky part was that we only got to hang out for a few hours before we both had to head back home. But still, it was great times!


5: Stephen: There was that one time when we got married. I think that about says it all! (I love you)


While I have other friends (like Rachel Greene and Sarah Lewis and others) that make my heart happy too, these 5 people have been there for me for a long time and they are more than friends now. They've become a part of my family.


Miss you guys and love you bunches and bunches!


Saturday, April 17, 2010

Reader Discretion is Advised

I would say 'Happy Saturday', but this is one of the blackest Saturdays I've ever faced.

The story I am about to share is not for the faint of heart. It will disturb you.

This I promise.

I know you were all looking forward to a weekend listing.
I was.

But, sometimes things happen that change your whole life.

This is one of those stories.

Stephen and I were headed to Wal-Mart this afternoon to buy groceries.

We made our list and we were all set to go. I just needed to grab something to go over the shirt I had on.

So I went to my closet and put on my brown hoodie-type thing.

***********(This is where it gets awkward/awful)*****************

I was about to zip it up when I felt something in my shirt.

Assuming it was just hair, I reached to remove it.

It was a spider.

A SPIDER!

It had been roosting on my brown hoodie-type thing and crawled onto me.

I flipped.

I stripped.

I screamed.

And started shaking and crying.

(I shudder just thinking back. Big convulsive shudders)

So Stephen came in to see what the commotion was and I less than calmly screamed "Spider in my shirt!!!"

So he searched the floor, found the spider and killed it.

I couldn't stop shaking.

I was convinced it bit me.

I am still convinced it bit me.

So, if in a few days I die, or become Spider-woman, be on alert.

This could happen to you. I wasn't prepared. But I am now.

Stephen will not only bug-check my slippers, but he will be spider checking my entire closet before I will go near it.

I may never wear that brown hoodie-thing again.

Let my story caution you. I hope none of you have to face the horrors that I did. I hope none of you have to go to sleep at night and dream about the spider that attacked you.

(This is a Public Service Announcement and a true story)